April 28th...approximately 11:30AM.

There are a few times in your life that you will remember forever. The day you got married, when your kids were born, etc. April 28th will be one day in my life that will never be forgotten. It was the day the doctor told us we had breast cancer. I will use the term "we" in this blog in reference to my wife and myself because even though she is the one that will truly be going through this experience, we have always been a team and will always be a team, therefore it is "us". As I sat there, there doctor was explaining the options to us and he could have been speaking jibberish for all I knew. I was trying real hard to listen but as time went on through the discussion, I was getting this knot in my stomach that just kept growing. At one point I had to get up and get a towel to dry my forehead off as I was about to vomit. I made it through the doctor's options, gathered myself, and then it was time to turn on the support for Jenn. We made it to the stairwell before Jenn broke down. I tried not to because I didn't want to show weakness I guess. That is the way men are trained. I was afraid if she saw me worried, it would just worry her more so I tried to be strong. We drove separate cars home from the doctor's office. On the way home I had to call work to let them know I would not be returning that day. I got about 2 sentences in to explaining what was happening and I lost it. I had to hang up. I can't even remember who I called next and about 2 sentences in, I had to hang up as I lost it again. That happened several times as I called people who needed to know what was going on as soon as possible. I knew then, this wasn't going to be easy.

The history

I guess I should start at the beginning of this ordeal and go forward from there. Back in August of '05 or so, Jenn felt a lump in her breast and it concerned her. She has a history of breast cancer in the family as her Grandmother and Aunt have both had it. Her Aunt just recently, 2 years ago. She felt she needed to get it checked out. She made appointment and saw the doctor. In the end it was determined that she drank way too much caffiene and it was probably just a calcification and nothing to worry about. Just cut back on the caffiene consumption. As time progressed, the lump became bigger, even with the lack of caffiene.

So, on April 17th, she went in again to have it checked out. This time there was a little more concern. Her doctor suggested that she get an Ultrasound on the lump and see if it showed any insight. After getting the results, it was too inconclusive and it was reccommended to get a Mammogram.

April 18th, after those results were in, again it was too inconclusive and it was decided she needed to have a biopsy. The biopsy was taken on Tuesday, April 25th. We were told that we would get the results on Friday the 28th.

The purpose of this blog

My wife is 33. She has breast cancer.

I set up this blog:
1) as an outlet for myself to get my feelings out. As most people who know me, know that I am not much of a conversationalist, let alone talking about my feelings. I thought this would be a good way to do so. I am in no means a writer and that fact will probably show throughout this blog.
2) for family and friends to stay up to date on what is happening with the situation we are in without having to be afraid to ask all the time. Also so I don't have to explain the situation repeatedly as I found out I would have to do once the news was broke to us. Although maybe that helped as each time I had to tell it, it did get a littel easier but the knot in my stomach came back every time I had to do so.
3) On the chance that maybe there is another husband going through this or will be going through this in the future and can look at my posts and know that they aren't the only one out there. Hopefully I will be adding resources I find for others to reference as well.

At this point I am not telling my wife about this as I am not really sure what it will entail and there may be some things I would like to keep to myself. The irony of that is that I am posting this to the whole world.

In the end, this blog's name will change to My Wife Beat Breast Cancer.